No, I’m not walking on string-cheese stilts. Our funny one-liner jokes are short, sweet and make you laugh. 38 Funny Haiku Poems! A blonde walked into the dentist office and sat down in a chair. What do you call a group of friends in California? Do you know what it's called when you see the sun, the moon and the stars all at the same time? How do you hide a $100 bill from a televangelist? Do I lose when the police officer says papers and I say scissors? My girlfriend tried to make me have se* on the hood of her Honda Civic…. Need to know ASAP. So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect". Claustrophobic. If growing up in the ’80s taught me one thing, it’s that my friends and I should have found a treasure map by now. All pro athletes are 
bilingual. About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard. I wrote a song about a tortilla. (Credit: justbadpuns.com). I’m writing my book in fifth person, so 
every sentence starts out with: “I heard from this guy who told somebody ...”. A perfectionist walked into a bar...apparently, the bar wasn’t set high enough. Bad Jokes That You Can’t Help but Laugh At, Funny Photos That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud, Cheesy Pick-Up Lines Guaranteed to Get a Laugh, The Absolute Best Funny Movies of All Time, Weird Facts You Never Knew About Laughter, Work Cartoons to Help You Get Through the Week, Clever Wedding Jokes Perfect for Any Speech, We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer), Do Not Sell My Personal Information – CA Residents. The trick is not to form an emotional bond. My friend Jim told me today that I make people very uncomfortable and have no respect for personal space.

A pack of batteries with a note saying "toy not included". If we shouldn’t eat at night, why do they put a light in the fridge? "I'm divorcing my wife. More importantly – who doesn’t love a good joke? The four most beautiful words in our common language: 
I told you so. 35 Biology Puns! Do you know a funny one liner? I do. Where am I going? What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? What is red, white, and blue? I once gave my husband the 
silent treatment for an entire week, at the end of which he declared, “Hey, we’re getting along pretty great lately!”. "Mom, when will I get lipstick like the other girls at my school?". I have clean conscience.

The closest a person ever comes to perfection is when he fills out a job application form. 70 Rockin' Music Puns! A man with seven feet on each leg gives you a dragonfruit. Did you hear about the crook who stole a calendar? I invented a drink today called ‘the Shutter Island Iced Tea’. Bonnie McFarlane. What has no pants and screams like a bear? We recommend our users to update the browser. I’m just not on the right planet. Guess who just woke up to 19 missed calls and 30 messages from his ex? What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke timing. "Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible." Never criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes. No, I'm not fat. 250 lbs here on Earth is 94.5 lbs on Mercury. How do you stop two blind men from fighting? Yeah, I’d probably freak out too if 
a raven flew into my house.

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